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Got the dance, what's next?
Your Questions Answered By Us
Q: I am 14 years old, and to be honest, I haveabsolutely no experience with relationships or anything like that. I'm notsure if I'm attractive. I tend to get depressed over almost anything, and Ican't tell if someone likes me or not for beans. This is gonna sound kindastupid, but then again, I don't know what to do, so help me.
Anyhow, I was at my friend's bar mitzvah party, and this girl asks me todance. So what the hell, we dance and all. So the problem is, I don't knowthe right words to ask her out. Okay, well, I do, but I'm very very shy, andI'm not exactly the best speaker when it comes to talking to the oppositesex, or at talking at all. Actually, I'm not even sure if she likes me thatmuch, or if she was desperate to dance with someone, or if she just pitiedme for not being with anyone.
Seriously though, I like her, and I don't want to lose yet another chance!
A: Been there... actually missed out on getting asked to dance. That rocks!
What I still find works, is when you call her, tell her you were wantingto go see 'some movie' and was wondering if she wanted to go see it.
First of all, stop getting depressed... life is going to be great... I didn't have my first kiss or girlfriend until I was 17, and now I run websites about love and am on a radio show about dating... so TRUST ME... Don't worry about it. #1 rule is to be confident. NOT cocky, just try not to be nervous, cause if you screw things up...YOU don't care... you got things goin on!
You gotta find way to call her. Is she in any of your classes or anything? So you could do the "hey, I forgot what the homework assignment was..." then you can say how you had a nice time dancing with her. Then start talking about new movies you've seen, and talk about new ones coming out, and HOPEFULLY she'll say there's one she wants to see... if not, mention one that you like (preferably one a chick will like too), and say "hey, I think _____ movie is going to be pretty good. You wanna go see it with me?"
The best, less awkward ways to ask someone out for first time, is to make the date about a particular thing, like a particular movie, this way you're not really asking her out on a date, you're asking if she wanted to go see that movie with you... because all you care about is the movie, and thought she might like to go as well. See? Less intimidating, right?
You still gotta be nice to girls, etc… but if you appear to be cool (which is someone who knows what they are doing, and feels comfortable), girls will like you.
Everyone is nervous, the ones that don't show it, get the girls... football players get chicks by accident sometimes... the girls see how confident they are on the football field so they are already IN. us regular guys have to appear cool in the real world which is harder... But trust me, you'll look back at these girls from high school and laugh.
--MH
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